2011 AFTERGLOW -- A SERIES OF BLESS FROM GOD

Yogyakarta, December 30 2011...the second last day of 2011.

5.30 in the morning and i was awaken by the cold...maybe it's because last night it rain so hard that it seems to cool down the hotness of Yogyakarta today...

I tried to sneak in myself into my blanket and close my eyes again, but i just lost my appetite to go back to sleep  after trying to rest my eyes again for 30 minutes.

Somehow, i just realize that in less than 50 hours, this will not be 2011 anymore. In less than 50 hours, it will be 2012. I was amazed at how time flies so quickly...

2011 is rather a special year for me. Though each year of my life is a precious one (in its own way) but 2011 is a different one. I found my maturity in 2011. I finally found myself and see myself as a grown up. As a woman, a human being, a soul that stays in a body given by GOD. I'm suddenly not a little girl anymore, nor the youngest child in my family. I'm just me.

I actually planned on continuing my study at UGM on early 2011. It was part of resolution that i want to get my master  degree title before i'm turning 25. All was ready but people may plan, GOD is still the one who decide your destiny. Things happened in early 2011. Bad ones...  It's like a rendezvous of what happened almost 12 years ago to my family when i was still a teenager. But me in 2011 is not me in the 90s. It's a different me.

Looking at my parents, i chose to postpone my plan of moving to Yogyakarta. I said to myself, "It's not the end, didi...you're just delaying what you can have now and for that GOD will double what you should have now". I tried to stay strong because i have to and i don't have the option to be weak for the sake of my parents..

It's funny though, because as i try to be strong, i've come to realize that how fragile my parents truly are. All my life, i was entitled with the thought that "They are parents so they ought to be strong. For their kids, for what they have decided to built together". But on 2011, i realize how misleading this thought can be.

Things were psychologically and physically hard for my parents. But my family made through of it pretty well. After all, we went through something worse once. For me, it's a phase of learning to see my parents not from a perspective as their children.

By mid of 2011, i have decided that i can no longer postpone my plan of moving to Yogyakarta. I wasn't accepted yet by UGM nor do i have attend the entrance test. However, i have the faith that UGM will accepted me and i have no worries for that. So, i tried to wrap things up from March. I said to the NGO where i work for the past 3 years, that the 2011 badge will be the last badge i teach and I said to my other boss that I'm quitting on May. Everyone was shocked and sad. They don't want me to leave but they understand that this is an important decision for me.

My boss, David and Brenda, who then happen to be my second parents said that they don't want to let me go but they know and realize how hard i tried to make the decision of moving to Yogyakarta. They know what i've been going through lately, so they know that it's important for me to take this step in order to find myself. And for that I thank them with all my heart.

The NGO also sad that i'm leaving, but they know a soul cannot be attached. A soul are meant to be free with no attachment. So one of the founder, Brother Wayan, said to me "Go, and our doors are always open whenever you want to come back."

I don't know if there is any word that can describe my gratitude to their unconditional love to me. I was amazed at how they accept me for who i am while i'm still struggling to find who i am. I was amazed at how they trust me while i'm still having difficulties of trusting my self. On top of everything, i was overwhelmed at how they believe that i'm strong while i'm still having hard time believing that i am strong.

So, i started my journey to Yogyakarta with that humble contented feeling. I know that no matter what the result is, whether i'm accepted or not by UGM, it doesn't matter because I know, those people will accept me for whoever I am.

June and July 2011 are the most relaxing month for me. Since i'm jobless, i spent my time doing part time job, catching up with my besties, playing around with my nephew and niece, spending some quality time with my mother, having a daughter father conversation with my dad and learning to actually live for "now" without worrying what will happened in the next five or ten or fifteen minutes or next few hours or next few days or next few months.

I went back and forth to Yogyakarta several time on my own until i finally accepted by UGM. Yes, i passed the entrance exam. And yes, now i am a post graduate student of international relations at UGM. But then that's it. There's nothing special about it. What special is how i got here, how i got there, to that point of accepted by UGM.

August was even a busier month. I was trying to pull everything together for my movement to Yogyakarta. I did all by myself. My mother still nagged me a bit. She used to think that i'm lack of the ability to live by myself or to take care of myself. But I think she had a take one big step of letting me to grow up as a woman this time.

My father is always a liberal person in my eyes. Then i know that he's actually a conservative one. Well... a father is always a father especially when he is faced with the fact that his only daughter are moving to Yogyakarta. On my side, i know he feels like he owes me a lot. I know that he feels like he has this debt that he needs to pay me. I know that he's trying to pay back all the lost time he misses when i was still a teenager. I told him "It's okay dad...everything will just be fine. If it's not you'll be the first one to know"


So, i move to Yogyakarta on end of August and start my adventure here. Almost 6 months, I enjoy every seconds, minutes, hours, weeks, months of it. I have shared on my other writings of how amazing the people i met in Yogyakarta. I think by now, i am running out of words to describe how amazing they are.

I always believe in destiny and the reason lies behind it. I believe that there is a reason why i meet each of these new people in my life here in Yogyakarta. I believe that each person will give their own color to my life and i thank them for that. :)

I believe that what ever GOD brings to my life, bad or good, are all a bless from Him. I believe it is GOD's way to lead me to find myself in Him and for that I thank him :)

I still do not know if i want to make list of resolutions for 2012. I may not make one. Simply because i want to feel how's life without target or burden. I'll just let myself decide on that very moment what to achieve and what to accomplish. Beside, ain't it the fun art of life? You never can predict what lies in your future or what future offers you...so let's just enjoy your time with that hot boiling youthful blood.


With Love
Dee

CLASS TRIP PART I - DEPOK BEACH!!!! Slide B - The Picturial

Orang bilang...photo, gambar dan lukisan menyimpan makna lebih dalam dari kata-kata dan mampu bercerita lebih dari yang kata-kata bisa lakukan...

Mungkin halaman ini bisa menyampaikan apa yang 'orang bilang' tersebut...

Ketika menyusun lay out dari halaman ini, ada satu lagu yang terus berkumandang sebagai backsound dan inspirasi saya... lagu itu adalah Ipank "Sahabat Kecil"... rasanya tak salah kalau saya menyarankan teman-teman untuk mendengarkan lagu itu juga ketika sedang mencoba memahami 'cerita' di halaman ini...

Bagi yang sedang terinspirasi secara romantis ada lagu kedua yang ingin saya rekomendasikan... 'Built To Last' by Melee. Sekilas lagu itu seperti lagu orang yang sedang jatuh cinta... bagi saya, lagu itu adalah lagu jatuh cinta saya terhadap bumi, ibu pertiwi dan langit pantai Depok yang sore itu merona-rona layaknya orang yang sedang pengakuan cinta... Sore itu jadi seperti semacam pengakuan cinta Tuhan kepada saya dengan memberikan kesempatan kepada saya untuk menjadi bagian sore yang indah itu bersama teman-teman baru yang dipertemukan melalui UGM...

Tanpa perlu kata-kata lagi...nikmatilah cerita sore hari di Pantai Depok, 6 Desember 2011...

When i see this picture...there is a song come across my mind: "The Boys" by SNSD --> yuck!! xD

Dari kiri ke kanan : 'Ayah' Havids, 'Si gagu' Chris, 'Tikus' Bintang, 'Master Splinter super Lebay' Mas Jamal, 'Caleb' Patria, 'Edward Kulonprogo' Abdulloh, 'Sharukh kaaaan' Arif, 'Baakkkaaarrr' Rio, dan our one only 'Om' Hangga...*kalem*

Flying!!!! yay!!!!!

Abdulloh: "Yihaaaaaaaaaaaaa!! Bintang here i comeeee!!!!!"

Me: Itu lele!!

Patria & Winda: *dengan wajah kaget* Lele???Dilaut?? ehmmm...

Abdulloh: *ambil ikan* fo-to-sa-ya-de-ngan-i-kan-i-ni...

Err...i'm not sure with either the concept or the theme of this particular photo... Kanibalism of Abdulloh? or what? eh... f^,^

Leader of ASEAN??????? errrr....doubtful... hahaha

Dimas Depok Beach --> sok cool deh kamyu... ;P

Ehem...ehem...ehem...cakep deh arif.... besok langsung dapet istri idaman... ;D

Pada norak deh fotoan ama motor kayak gitu aja... *padahal mupeng juga* 

Abdulloh: dadaaaaaa didiiiii... *melambai-lambaikan tangan ala Miss Thailand* LOL

para nelayan kita... :)

Selamaaaaattttttttt Makaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!!!!!! :D

 Ehem...ehem...jadi sama Patria toh Mbak yu Tanti ini... haha

Loh...ini trus apa??? kok sama Hangga??? Wah Tanti...janganlah kau merusak cerita cinta Hangga dan Patria... wkwkwkwkwk

Waaahhh... apa pula ini?? Jadi yang mana sih yang bener ini? Tanti dan Bang Toyib? Oh no...Oh no...*lebay*

Sudah mas Jamal...tidak usah capek-capek merenung...cukup kendarai motormu itu untuk pulang kerumah anak istrimu...supaya kau tidak dipanggil Bang Toyib terus...hahahaha :D

PENUTUP

Dan untuk meringkas serta membungkus petualangan kita di pantai Depok, inilah foto-foto pilihan yang kurang lebih mewakili suasana sore penuh berkat dan berkah serta rahmat dari-Nya (mengutip kata-kata Mas Jamal) hehe...

Dan...

itu kita... :)


WITH LOVE
DEE

CLASS TRIP PART I - DEPOK BEACH!!!! Slide A

December 6, 2011 --> our very first class trip to Depok beach. Thank's to the transportation provided by Patria and Hangga, half of the class member were able to have a comfortable trip to Depok in a very cozy air conditioned cars, except for Tanti and Mas Jamal... :D

I can't remember what time we arrived at Depok beach... i think it's around 3 or 4pm... almost 4pm i guess, because the first thing we did when we got there was looking for a mosque so the muslims can do their afternoon pray.

There were only 12 of us (half of the class), 3 are non muslims (Me, Bintang and Chris)

The one who wears the sunglass is Bintang. The one with that afro hair, sitting on the ground is Chris.

Special thanks to Mas Jamal for the subsidy he gave to buy some seafood and also luckily Hangga brought a surprise. He and I got extra money after dedicating ourselves for a one heck seminar. We choose to use that extra money to add on the subsidy from Mas Jamal. It's actually more like we don't feel good about enjoying "that" money who came from Mr. You Know Who... (Remember that moment we spent with "Him" twice a week every Tuesday and Thursday?????)

So, off we go to the fish market and grab our seafoods!!!  Slyly... the guys just ran and left the buying stuff to the girls. Patria only said "I want some squid" and then he's like vanished...

So, Winda chose to buy 2 kilograms of clam which everyone thought as crazy but at the end of the day it was the most favorite dishes everyone chose... typical...haha... I chose to buy 1 kilo of fish, 1 kilo of squid, and then 1/2 kilo of small prawns, simply because it's the most expensive seafood. Total cost for the seafood was 100.000... not bad for that much seafoods,,,

Patria picked the restaurant that's right facing the beach. After deciding how do we want the seafood to be cooked, we started our little adventure at the beach. Yihaaaaa it's having fun time!!! xD

 

This is our one only Thailand friend : Abdulloh. Hangga called him the Edward Kulonprogo... (so much for Bella)... He's cute in this photo, but please pay attention to the guy standing behind him and what is his hand doing... (FYI, it's Patria wkwkwkwk)

 

Now, this is what i call with CONFIDENT. Bintang is showing off his sexy black long leg which i did not realize back then until i pay attention to each photos we took that day. :D way to go bro!!! black is masculine!! haha

One of the most memorable moment started here. It's the Story of Patria, Handphone and the Flip-flop...So, down there in the picture is the starting point of the story. Patria was busy with his handphone while walking along the beach....

Suddenly, a big heavy wave came and hit him,,, hardly,,,who was still busy with his handphone (blackberry,,,yes,,,it is...). The wave took his flip flop away...and he ran towards the wave, trying to catch the flip flop, almost fell into the water, half wet, yet lost another flip flop after catching the first lost one and ended up getting both easily after the wave came back towards him again...

  

Too bad i was too astonished and overwhelmed by how it happened.It's just super hilarious. PERIOD. xD so i didn't catch the moment in a photo... haha

Now this one is the second funniest moment caught in a photo... Rio and Bintang were trying to get a nice and cool photo of themselves. I was just goofying around and found this dead crab. I pick it up, threw it to Rio and it landed right on his head... LOL!!! 

Arif started the game of catching the petite crab and putting the catch into this plastic glass. That's like the first time i saw Arif being playful... :)

Need more explanation? here we go...bunch of boys found a new toy and they were eager to try it. That big motor (which i do not know what to call was rented by Chris). Pretty cool, right?

Nemo?Baloon fish? You name it...

 

People say... a photograph worth thousand  unexplainable words... this is the perfect example of it... the ambiance, the sky, the boat, the beach, and THE HUGGING... so sweet... :)

May what Depok Beach has brought to your relationship will last forever, Patria and Hangga...

LOL!!!

Now, let's talk more about Depok Beach... It's not the best beach, indeed. The surrounding was rather dirty that day. It's no different with Lebih Beach in Bali so i don't know which one i like better.

However, one thing for sure that day is special thanks to the people i spent the day with. These people in the picture below (including Winda who stayed at the restaurant looking after our bags) are the reason why that day become so special and meaningful. And it's not just me. God seems to have the same thought with me that day. The sky was extremely beautiful... and I can't thank God enough for that very happy moment.

These beautiful soul were born to grow to be a free soul as free as the air we breath, to be beautiful as beautiful as the sky that very afternoon.

I thank to each of you...to the 12 people who share that beautiful afternoon with me and to the other classmates who didn't have the chance to join us that day... Thank you... =D

things i HATE and LOVE about jogja

Yes, Jogjakarta has captured my heart...but just like the concept of Yin and Yang, this city also has the bad side...

What i hate about Jogja are....

The traffic light... if the traffic light is in a crossroad, it takes about more than 60 seconds for the red light and only 20 seconds for the green light. At some special crossroad, the red light takes 106 seconds... and when the sun is high up there on the sky, i'm telling you IT IS FUCKIN HOT!!!!


People would stare at you oddly and awkwardly if you go out (e.g. to the mall or just to grab some food in a small resto, or cafe or even "warung") and use only short pant - almost hot pant like - and flip-flop... why would i want to use long pant if the weather is freaking hot and if i just want to go a few blocks away from my boarding house? *sigh*


Parking fee EVERYWHERE!!!!!! At the bank, at the mall, on the side of the street!!!!! and even WORST --> My own campus!!!!! I wouldn't complain if the public transportation is supportive. But it almost like if you don't have your own transportation, you can only do your activities until up to around 4 or 5 if you hold your life onto the public transportation...


CRUEZY STUDENTS WITH THEIR CRUEZY MOTORCYCLE!!!! Jogjakarta is the city of young people and old people. The young people represent the students and the youth who come to this city on the name of knowledge (just like me) and the old people are usually the people who are actually staying here in Jogjakarta for a long time... I don't know if it's because this is Indonesia, but the students here, they drive motorcycle CARELESSLY... I've been riding my motorcycle for almost 6 years now with only 3 accidents, all being hit or crashed by other rider. But in this city, i'm afraid i'll be the crasher any time soon that it makes me ride my scooter extra slowly... My speedometer never pass 50km/h...the comparison when i was in bali was like 70km/h... For God Sake...

Now what I LOVE ABOUT JOGJA are:

Exactly because it's THE CITY OF STUDENT. There are a lot of choices: amazingly affordable to amazingly expensive, all is available for you that you're free to make your choices. In Bali? everything is expensive. Even if you try to live a simple life like mine it's still expensive.

NEW AMAZING FRIENDS a.k.a FAMILY!!!! I've met amazing people thank's to Jogja. My new friends come from all over Indonesia and we have so many differences that it seems like the day has no ends when i spend my time with them. It's just that too many things i want to know about them, too many things we want to know about each other and too many things we want to find as answer of our very similar questions, though sometimes different. All of these people, despite the differences we have, we embrace one another as a family. I don't know exactly how I end up in this class with this amazing people. Should i just say, it's destiny? :)

SO MANY THINGS TO LEARN FROM THIS CITY. It offers dozens of youth community, workshop, seminars and library. All if not for free then it's very affordable. And then again, i have more chances to meet new people, to get to know more people who have different experience from me. I remember I always get excited every time i think about how thrilling those moment would be if i became part of it. To meet new people and to get to know them. If i was still in my old shelf, i wouldn't have this feeling i guess...

If i think about it again... moving to Jogja has a very profound meaning to me. It's so special and personal in many ways. I used to think i know myself, but when i move to Jogja it feels like i just discover myself, discover my world and more importantly i get to know my parents better. Living with them for 24 years does makes me familiar with my parents but i think i took it for granted just like the air that i breath everyday. As a daughter, i only thought from my shoes, never from their shoes. But when i move to Jogja, my father and my mother become someone new for me that i've became to understand them better...

Yes, Jogja has bad aspects but wouldn't it what we call as Perfection? To be perfect is to be imperfect, just like the concept of Yin and Yang... for something to be called good, then there is other thing need to be called bad. Whether you want to see only the bad side or the good side, it's all your choice. My choice is i want to enjoy every second i spend here in Jogja, the bad ones, the good ones because one day those seconds will mount up into stories that i can share not only to my (future) children but also to everyone. :)


With Love
Dee

Yogyakarta 2011: Sebuah Ikatan Yang Akhirnya Terwujud

Entah kenapa, sejak SMA saya merasakan ada ikatan batin dengan Yogyakarta...


Sewaktu kelas 3 dan sedang persiapan memilih universitas untuk melanjutkan ke S1, saya punya angan-angan ingin kuliah di UGM dengan konsentrasi Psikologi. Saya menceritakan angan-angan tersebut kepada guru BP saya dan dia sangat bersemangat sekali, bahkan jauh lebih bersemangat dari saya sendiri. Guru BP saya itu kemudian mengumpulkan semua informasi tentang ujian masuk di UGM dan hal-hal apa saja yang harus saya persiapkan. Semakin dekat dengan hari H, saya mencoba mengungkapkan keinginan itu kepada orangtua yaitu ibu saya. Yah...apa mau dikata...beliau tidak mengijinkan dengan alasan saya adalah anak perempuan satu-satunya dan beliau terlalu khawatir membiarkan saya kuliah jauh. Disamping itu mungkin juga karena pertimbangan kondisi keluarga yang agak labil waktu itu.

Singkat cerita, saya membatalkan niat saya kuliah di UGM dan akhirnya diterima di Universitas Udayana. jurusan sastra inggris. Tapi jauh dalam hati saya sudah tahu bahwa suatu hari, kaki saya ini akan berjalan dan berkelana di daerah Yogyakarta sambil menempa ilmu di UGM. Beberapa tahun kemudian, akhirnya keinginan itu terwujud.

Kota ini menjadi sangat spesial bagi saya, bukan karena saya akhirnya berhasil masuk UGM. Tapi lebih karena bagaimana Tuhan membuka banyak cerita selama masa transisi pindah ke Yogyakarta. Ada banyak cerita tersingkap dari sisi yang tidak pernah saya duga sebelumnya. Percakapan dua hari terakhir sebelum kepindahan dengan ibu saya, obrolan dengan ayah selama perjalanan bis 20 jam Bali-Yogyakarta, sms dengan kakak saya dan bahkan sebuah kalimat singkat meminta restu pindah ke Yogyakarta kepada kakak tertua saya menjadi begitu bermakna...

Dalam kesendirian berpetualang di Yogyakarta, saya malah menemukan diri saya sendiri dan belajar bagaimana caranya untuk benar-benar mencintai diri saya sendiri.

Well...from the beginning, i always know that moving to Yogyakarta was meant to be for me... :)


Selamat datang di Yogyakarta!!!!